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Honking Noise on CD/Radio Freaks Me Out

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It never fails, I fall for it every time I hear “traffic noises” mixed into a song I’m listening to while driving. It doesn’t matter if I’ve heard the song a thousand times or if I recorded it “back when the band was together, man”. There’s just some sounds that shouldn’t be allowed to be heard on a song. They include, but are not limited too: Honking, Sirens, Doppler Whoosh of a Speeding/Passing Car, Engine Starting/Revving, Heavy Trucks/Industrial Equipment, Low Rumbling, and Babies Crying, (yes I know, what would a baby be doing in the middle of the road? It’s not a confusing sound, I just hate crying babies).

You’d think with the world as disclaimer/sue happy as it is, there’d be a warning label forced upon CD’s that stated something like, “Warning! Track 8 has traffic noises associated with the song. Be aware that they are not real and please don’t drop your coffee and swerve into oncoming lanes and kill a bus full of crippled, homeless, nuns.” Hmmm, perhaps I just found my calling.

Why am I so naive or stupid to fall for this? It’s just a sound like any other. Maybe it’s because I don’t hear a lot of honking or sirens in my day to day driving. When I do, I’m usually able to witness it first hand or I am directly involved in a potentially violent, soon to be six o’clock news, road rage incident. My point being is that I usually don’t have sounds sneak up on me or come shooting out of nowhere while I’m driving. Most of the time, the interior of my car is like a piano bar or lizard lounge, reminiscent smells from the ’70s, cheap food and toothless women wearing wigs they found outside in the parking lot, i.e. it’s a pretty mellow scene. I don’t need to be cruising along, content and then “on the look out” for a piercing foreign sound approaching my shangri-la.

Who are the musicians that want this stuff on their albums? I wonder if they sit around the studio and say to the engineer, “Hey, throw some honking in there. That’ll freak ’em out!” or “This song is so beautiful, but it’s missing something… I know, a helicopter. Perfect!” I don’t remember the legends of classical music ever needing strange noises in their work. What’s that? They didn’t have cars and stuff back then? Yeah, OK, good point.

All I’m saying is, that instead of “Judas Priest made my kid commit suicide”, the next big law suit is gonna be “Radiohead made me crash my car!”

Be sure and call me if you need me to testify on your behalf.

Egg On,

Ramblin’ Rooster


Written by Ramblin' Rooster

September 26, 2008 at 4:32 am

2 Responses

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  1. Подскажите, где найти владельца

    С меня пыво)
    [url=]Что такое?[/url]

  2. Спасибо

    Ramblin' Rooster

    October 15, 2008 at 3:32 am

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