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How To Identify a Moron

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How to identify a moron? This might seem like an easy thing to do, but sometimes it’s similar to the dating experience. I person might start out pleasant and apparently in tune to their faculties, but after a while, “the leopard shows it’s spots”. I think some people can’t hide their faults or short comings, those people you get an instant vibe from. The moment you meet them you just know, “Nope.” If you were in possession of a forehead sized rubber stamp, you’d ink their face, “REJECT”.

To me, a telltale sign is if any person uses the phrase, “I KNOW ALL ABOUT yada-yada-yada”. This is beyond a red flag. This is a flag on fire, next to a highly flammable, open top, chemical tank, sitting upon a vacuum sealed glass case containing the world’s deadliest airborne virus. Get away fast!

First of all, the arrogance alone is overwhelming. Who could ever think they know “all about” something? They could be extremely knowledgeable, even a master of expert of such thing, but to think you couldn’t learn something new is a fate worse than dying. Never turn off your brain. Never turn away from learning. In fact, it’s when you think you can’t go any further with your mind that the real break threw happens. This usually comes from looking at it from a totally different perspective. Where do new perspectives come from? Other people are the easiest and fastest way.

Secondly, 90% of the time, the statement is a complete fabrication of the truth and the person who utters such nonsense doesn’t know everything about anything and very little in between. What inspires them to say such a binding and absolute death sentence? Ego. Those who lack physical beauty, personality, talent or charm most often go after the rewards of being smart. It’s no where near the shallow gratification of the others and can be rendered null and void in certain company. Some people couldn’t care less about intelligence, while others are put off by it because by demonstrating the slightest sign of brain power triggers the insecurity inside them, painfully reminding them of their own lack of mental ability. So be careful if you do choose this avenue as your flare to stand out from others and never say “I know all about…”

Thirdly, the phrase is meaningless. The conversation usually goes, “Do you know anything about blah-blah-blah?” “I know all about blah-blah-blah.” OK, great. The only reason the question was asked, was to find out if the REAL question was even worth asking. No cares if you know everything about it, they just want to know if you can help with the one problem they have encountered.

Finally, the opposing argument is that it’s just a figure of speech, a splash of sarcasm to brighten the day. If such is the case, then it’s even more annoying than before and I would reply that “@#$% OFF!” is also, just a phrase.

Egg On,

Ramblin’ Rooster


Written by Ramblin' Rooster

September 28, 2008 at 5:28 am

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