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Spin the Door, Break an Arm

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I have had a lot of people tell me I have a child-like demeanor. I’m not talking about being immature or juvenile, but rather possessing that special quality that kids have that make adults angry that they’ve grown up. I believe that quality is the refusal to be bored, which oddly enough is the least likely candidate to find in a child, especially on theses days. Times have changed and so have the kids, but to look at the world through a child’s eyes, sure does make living a soulless existence tolerable.

What’s a soulless existence? The zombies we become, (me included) after following the monotonous weekly grind. You can’t help it. That much repetitive action forces you to lose part of your soul and almost all of your joy. It’s hard to “love life” when you’re constantly running around, or working twelve hours at a job you’d quit if you could without even thinking about it. So that’s why I find it important to entertain myself whenever and wherever I go.

If you were to place me under surveillance, you might just catch me suddenly laughing out loud for what seems to be for no reason. That’s because I like to think about funny things. I have several sit-com-esque daydreams everyday. I like to think about the people that stress me out or piss me off in wacky situations and compromising positions. It’s quite the gas.

I also try to take advantage of the playground that some people consider the world. No, I’m not a continental traveler. I find things in my everyday life to be exciting and exotic.

When I was transferred to a branch office in a new city and state, the first thing I got excited about when I saw the new office building were the two doors. The first one is an awesome, handicap-automatic opening door, the other one a revolving door. I absolutely love revolving doors. There can’t be a funner way of entering or leaving a building. I want to meet the guy/gal who invented the revolving door and give them a great big hug, maybe even a kiss, (on the cheek, on the cheek).

Sometimes when I go through the revolving door, I pretend I’m on the ‘Price Is Right’ in the “spin-off for the showcase showdown” and I spin the door as hard as can. So hard that if someone is behind me that can’t even get in. They stand there as if they’re trying to time it, like trying to jump in on competitive double dutch. Other times if someone goes in right in front of me I jump in there with them in the quarter stall. Apparently there’s some unwritten law about not crowding in to the space, ‘because when I do it they always look at me like they’re about to call the cops or an ambulance, (after they kick my ass). On occasion I’ll let the person go in front of me, then I try to get through the door without touching it or letting it hit me. Once I stopped halfway through, clutching the push bar to simulate a panic attack. Give something for those witnessing it to talk about later.

This is all just a revolving door. Just imagine all the other wonderful things in the world that you can play with. If you come up with any good ones, please let me know.

Egg On,

Ramblin’ Rooster


Written by Ramblin' Rooster

October 4, 2008 at 4:50 am

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