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Archive for November 4th, 2008

Women’s Magazines Rule Waiting Rooms

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Whenever I go someplace that I have to wait in a lobby that has magazines, I always go for the girlie ones. Cosmo is by far the best. I don’t much care for Redbook or Vogue or anything that is about fashion or other crap like that. I just like reading the soft porn articles and taking the tests/quizzes. I find it amazing that I have never met a woman in my life that resembles anything like the women who write in to that magazine. Perhaps I do/did know some, but they must have chosen to keep that side secret from me.

You don’t know me on a personal level, so let me tell you that I use to love sports. So much that I took them way to personally and would, on occasion become overly emotional about certain outcomes that I found to be unfavorable. In the height of my love for sports I never had a desire to read about them. I also hate reading about finance/business, home decor, babies, cars, technology or fitness. So the pickings are pretty small.

One poll from Cosmo, I remember vaguely, was some kind of weird “Top Ten” list of why not to do things, (or some such nonsense). On the list was Uma Thurman’s drug overdose in ‘Pulp Fiction’ for “best reason not to do drugs”. Which I think is just silly. I think that scene in the movie teaches us not to take things out of other people’s coat pockets and snort them if you don’t know what they are. I really don’t think it’s a very strong message.

You want to be scarred off of trying drugs, take a guy I use to know. His name was John, but we’ll call him Jack to protect his anonymity. Jack use to enjoy recreational jabbing of needles into his arm. He enjoyed it so much that his “hobby” became a full time job and eventually he became a workaholic. Jack’s body wasn’t too happy with this decision to work so much overtime. The long hours started to take effect and with it a toll on Jacks’ body. Soon, it became necessary for Jack to sit on the toilet with his pants down to inject himself, because “getting high” had such a violent reaction with his system that he’d immediately lose control of his bowels. Now if that’s not the saddest picture of a man you can paint, then you must be a much better artist than I.

But we’re talking about magazines here… Women of the world, if you’ve ever needed justification for your superiority, then look to your dominance of the “waiting room” magazine. I sure it’s all you ever wanted.

Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster

Written by Ramblin' Rooster

November 4, 2008 at 5:33 am