Sunday's drive up your blog… with Ramblin' Rooster

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Rock Paper Scissors It

with 2 comments

Am I a simple man? That’s a very difficult question to answer. I am easily amused, easily angered in certain situations, (and certain days) and easily distracted. Um, what was I talking about?

Does that make me a simple man? Sure, (I don’t know). I like simple answers, I like to find simple solutions and I reveal in simple ideas. Having said that let me now make the most ridiculous statement I’ve ever made. Rock Paper Scissors could solve the entire world’s conflict.

Not just solve international disputes, domestic as well. Why have I gone insane? Maybe and maybe it’s because insanity is the only thing that can change the world. Just take a moment and look at the genius of Rock Paper Scissors:

  1. It’s completely fair, balanced and equal, requiring almost no training/education
  2. Everyone has the same chance at winning, (except for people who are smarter than their opponent)
  3. It’s near impossible to cheat, (successfully)
  4. There’s no disputing, challenging, or confusion as to the result of the game
  5. It’s dirt simple

Imagine you’re watching COPS and the officer goes to the trailer park to find the drunken, rednecks going at each other. Instead of wasting time listening to them sludge through their alcohol soaked minds looking for a lie to tell, the officer just pulls up and says, “Rock Paper Scissors time. Whoever loses goes to jail.” Boom, in and out, five minutes top. Just think of all good police officers could do for the community with that kind of time freed up.

Another example, a couple are in divorce court, she wants alimony, he doesn’t want to pay, judge walks in says, “Rock Paper Scissors time. Winner decides.” Boom, in and out, five minutes top. Just think of how much quicker the justice system would move. We could finally get back to managing the piles of frivolous lawsuits. Yippee!

The application is endless, bound only by our mental limitations. Whenever there is a disagreement, Rock Paper Scissors it. Can’t decide or agree on something, don’t fight, Rock Paper Scissors it.

One word of advice, if you choose to implement this in your home or with family/friends, establish the rules before doing so. The most common discord found in Rock Paper Scissors is the number of rounds to go before the final decision is rendered. The loser will always try to “up the count” for as long as it takes to win, “Best two out of three” “Best three out of five” “Best seven out of ten” etc. You know the type, grasping by the pathetic string that probably got them in the mess to begin with.

So let Rock Paper Scissors decide your fate, your life, your everything. Will I read this blog tomorrow? 1… 2… 3…

Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster


2 Responses

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  1. I can handle rock and paper, but scissors- give a person with a paw a break. Visit me at:

    Sandy Says

    December 3, 2008 at 12:45 pm

  2. Sandy Says, thanks for sniffing around my blog, I appreciate it. Have an e-treat on me.
    (For those of you not hip to Sandy, she’s a dog. Go check it out.)

    Ramblin' Rooster

    December 4, 2008 at 6:11 am

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