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Archive for April 20th, 2009

Wandering the Battery Wasteland

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When I was a kid I loved the movie ‘The Road Warrior’. Through the years I’ve seen several post-apocalyptic themed movies. I don’t know who to credit for the first person to think about and share the post-apocalyptic idea, but for me it will be the people of “road warrior”. Now, that I am adult, I think of the film when I walk around me house.


“That’s a weird thing to say Ramblin’ Rooster, whatever do you mean?” In my house the most sought after commodity is the double A and triple A battery. Regardless of how many batteries the wife or I buy at the store, the “quest for fresh batteries” never seems to cease.

As I walk through my house I start to notice pieces of plastic laying on the carpet, table, counter and just about any flat surface a child can find. Upon further inspection the pieces of plastic turn out to be the backs of remotes, and covers of other, miscellaneous electronic devices.


My children are looters and pillagers of the battery. Anything that takes a battery is a potential victim of their stealing. It doesn’t matter what the device is, it could be for my hearing aid or pace maker, they don’t care, they just take it.


These battery pirates, whom I use to call “my kids”, have no respect for the laws of batteries either. They mix and match brands and types. On occasion they have overlooked, ignored or been just plain ignorant to polarity, which is nice to be told, “It doesn’t work. I need new batteries” when all they need to do is flip them over.


In addition, they leave their discarded batteries everywhere. These “dead batteries” are like corpses hanging from trees to warn and scare trespassers in scary, jungle, village. The worst offense is when they leave the “old batteries” next to the “new batteries”. It’s quite literally draining dealing with batteries and these bandits.


I don’t even know what they’re using these batteries for. I hardly ever see them with any devices that use batteries, so I’m kind of afraid that they may be eating them. It could be that they’re selling them on the next block over.


This is fine I guess, but I think I deserve a cut.


Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster

Written by Ramblin' Rooster

April 20, 2009 at 1:27 am