Sunday's drive up your blog… with Ramblin' Rooster

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Bacon & Dogs, Dogs & Bacon

with 2 comments

I’ve been watching television again. I learned that dogs love bacon. They think about it all the time and would quite possibly stab you in the throat to get a piece, (if they could wield a knife). I would think dogs wouldn’t like bacon because it’s not very meaty and it’s very greasy. What? Yes, I do like bacon, but what’s that have to do with… Oh, I get it. If I like bacon why wouldn’t a dog love it? I knew those commercials couldn’t be wrong.


Prior to viewing the commercial, I didn’t know dogs loved bacon. Someone obviously did know that dogs love bacon and they decided to capitalize on it. First they spent a lot of time in a laboratory figuring out how to make bacon out of something other than bacon. It had to look like bacon, didn’t have to smell like it, which is odd because a dogs scene of smell far outweighs his sight, but as we all know dogs don’t do the buying of snacks, owners do. So as long as it looked like bacon, owners were up for buying it.


Next they had to sell the fake bacon to dog owners. This was easy. Just tell us dogs love bacon. Then we’ll know this and have to buy it. We couldn’t deny our furry friends that to which they love.


In the commercial they claim that “dogs don’t know it’s not bacon”. I for one disagree. I think dogs are fully aware that it’s not bacon. I think they couldn’t care less if it is or isn’t. It’s a break from their dry, boring, “bowl food”. It could be fake Brussels sprouts for all they cared.


Furthermore, why would anyone want to convenience their pet of a lie? What kind of a weirdo thinks they have to be dishonest and cheat their pet? It’s a treat. Why are you pretending it’s something it’s not?


That would be like me saying, “Readers don’t know this blog is over.”


Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster

Written by Ramblin' Rooster

May 4, 2009 at 3:08 am

2 Responses

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  1. Great! As always.

    So, it’s not bacon, but what is it? Or do we just call it “Not Bacon?”


    Perplexed in Peking


    May 5, 2009 at 4:04 am

    • alantru, always funny… “could you pass the ‘not bacon’ please?”
      Since I’m your biggest fan I went downstairs to look at the package to see just what these mystery strips were made of. Let’s see… ground wheat, corn gluten meal, wheat flour, water, sugar, glycerin, soybean meal, hydrogenated starch hydrolysate, bacon (preserved with sodium nitrite), salt, bacon fat (preserved with BHA), meat, phosphoric acid… WAIT! WTF?!?! Dogs don’t know it’s not bacon because it has bacon, bacon fat and an unclassified type of meat in it!!! So it’s not bacon because it is bacon. The empire is crumbling… Thanks for commenting and revealing the demise of the universe.

      Ramblin' Rooster

      May 6, 2009 at 3:48 am

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