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Posts Tagged ‘smoking

Quitting Smoking: Easy As Cutting Off Your Head

with 8 comments

I’ve been a smoker for the majority of my life, meaning I’ve smoked for more years than not while being on this planet. It’s rather odd when you think about it in that way. It really makes you marvel at the durability of the human body or question the detrimental effects of smoking. I’m leaning towards the amazing power of the human body to overcome toxins. Three weeks ago, (as of yesterday) I quit. This is not the longest I’ve ever stopped, but certainly the best attempt I’ve made in the last decade.

 

Quitting smoking is easy. You just simply stop participating in the act. I won’t fight you if you want to punch me in the face for saying that. I know it sounds stupid, much like, “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people”. Its statements like this that make people kill people. On the other hand, it really is odd that the hard part about not smoking is the mind games, because that’s all that remains. That’s the part that no one ever seems to talk about. It’s always the nicotine cravings and your daily routine and this and that and blah, blah, blah, but in the end it’s nothing more than you and your inner voice duking it for the rest of your life. That’s the part that I never seem to be able to deal with. Much like cutting off your head, it’s easy to do in theory, but hard to actually do the cutting.

 

Perhaps you’re wondering if I used an aid, perhaps you stopped reading a paragraph ago. Either way, I did use an aid, but not what you think, (probably). I didn’t use the patch or gum or even medication. No, I used a fake cigarette. It’s an electronic cigarette that emits a “harmless” vapor. Of course I think it’s only harmless to the second-handers, but really, as a smoker, what do I care. There are cartridges that you load into this battery device that deliver the “vapor” and the vapor contains nicotine. The idea, much like all the cessation aids, is to “wean” yourself off the real cigarettes.

 

I’m using the “high” nicotine cartridges and have no intention of weaning myself anywhere. Once the gross of cartridges I have is gone, I’m done. I think I’ve gotten over the “shakes and sweats” or kicking, so all that’s left is the self contained, all mental, life long argument of, “Have a cigarette. No! Have a cigarette. No! Have a cigarette. No!”

 

I will say the electronic cigarette is pretty nifty as a gimmicky thing and it has helped me to stop, (I guess). Ironically, the packaging that comes with the cigarette says that it’s not intended for trying to quit. Liability I guess, but who knows. I will say that it’s expensive and somewhat cumbersome to keep up with, especially if you’re an all day smoker. I would recommend getting the cigar over the cigarette though, the cartridges last longer and you get more “vapor”.

 

The draw backs? Now that I’m free to smoke anywhere I want, I find myself doing it all the time. I never smoked in my house because of my kids, but now that it’s harmless, I’m a vapor chimney. I vaporize at the office, in my car, in stores and just about everywhere I go. I vaporize twice as much as I smoked. I fear that I’ll have to use vapor patches to wean myself from the electronic device. The other one, and this is very vain I suppose, is the fact that I feel somewhat silly. For all practical purposes, I’m fake smoking. Is it better than lung cancer? Absolutely. Does it matter when I’m standing outside with real smokers and I’ve got this light up toy? Not really, but like I said, it beats dying.

 

What can I say, nothing is cooler than smoking a REAL cigarette.

 

Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster

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Written by Ramblin' Rooster

March 27, 2009 at 3:25 am

Class B Cigarette Disappointment

with 2 comments

Have you ever had one of those long running jokes in your life that has been around so long you don’t even remember where it came from? Well, although it’s not funny-funny, Class B cigarettes has always been one of mine.

 

If you’re not a smoker, you may not know that every pack of cigarettes you can buy, regardless of price or quality, has stamped somewhere on the box, “Class A”. Not knowing what this means, one is lead to believe that Class A is the top of the line. It also makes you wonder if there’s such thing as Class B, Class C, Class D, etc. Knowing first hand, (and second hand) how nasty and disgusting Class A cigarettes are, imagining how filthy and vile Class B must have to be is where the humor, as faint as it is, came into play.

 

Today my boss brought up smoking and asked if my cigarettes where fire proof. I tired with all my might to refrain from saying, “How f#@%ing stupid is you?” Guess what? I was successful and said something like, “I don’t think so, that would kind of defeat the purpose.” He became frustrated and said, “No, not fire proof, but Fire Safe”. Apparently they’ve invented a way for cigarettes left behind in ashtrays to stop burning if left unattended. My boss went on to say that FSC is printed on the box… so now you know how we got on to the subject of Class A. I said I wondered if there was Class B cigarettes. He responded with, “Look it up on the internet.” So I did.

 

Turns out that there used to be Class B cigarettes, but they don’t make them anymore. The “class” designation wasn’t used for anything other than tax purposes. How disappointing. I had a friend tell me that clove cigarettes are Class B, but I have never seen anything to be able to fully support that statement. All in all, it’s a big let down.

 

I suppose next you’re going to tell me Santa Claus isn’t real and that he smoked the last of the Class B cigarettes.

 

Egg On!

Ramblin’ Rooster

Written by Ramblin' Rooster

February 5, 2009 at 5:52 am