Sunday's drive up your blog… with Ramblin' Rooster

The official blog of

Meaning of Life

with 19 comments

My father came visit this weekend.
We we’re talking.
He’s getting on in the years.
One thing lead to another and I asked the question, “Do you fear dying?”
His response?
“Who gives a shit?”

Egg On,

Ramblin’ Rooster

-Ramble me Rooster-

The answer to last week’s riddle was “Surveyed monuments of quarter sections” but since no one could tell that I’m going with Michael’s “Terminator’s eye”, (’cause that’s what I was thinking).

Tonight’s riddle:

How do you make a meal with no food?

Submit you’re answer as a comment for the chance to win fabulous make-believe prizes and come back next Sunday for the answer. Good luck!

19 Responses

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  1. Man, I hope I have his attitude when I get to be his age, rather than cowering away from dying like the “I don’t wanna die” sort of guy I think I might be.

    That’s awesome.

    Of all the bloggers I sort of know, you’re the most enigmatic. I think you get it from your dad.

    Today on Rachel Ray: How to Make a Meal with No Food!

    Hi, everybody. Today I’m going to make a very special dish with a recipe that has been in the Ray family for literally minutes!

    Let’s take a look. First of all, we need to grab our cutting board, our colander and our monogrammed towels! I love initials! RR! They’re awesome!

    Anyway, let’s get busy. While you’re waiting for your colander to warm up, why not click over to my website and purchase one of my many subpar cookbooks? They’re beautifully handcrafted by Sri Lankan orphans and the ink is made from their exquisite tears! They’re such darlings!

    OK, now with the cutting board stowed safely in the overhead compartment, we can now open this fine bottle of 2008 Boone’s Farm. Yummers! I love getting bombed while talking! It’s a thing I do that drives my husband crazy! (Makes “crazy” face and accidentally belches.)

    Whee! Before I take my top off, I’d like to see how our meal is coming along. Let’s take a look in the oven. Hmmm. Empty. Oh, well. Let’s have another swig!

    Jeepers! I sure wish someone would do something about all these lights! They make my eyes hurt! My doctor warned me about my tendency to focus on bright objects, but I’m the one paying the bills! I said, I’m Rachel Ray goddamnit and slapped him with a pointless lawsuit! Yum!

    I’m going to take a nearly-naked nap right now, but while I do, let’s take a look at some of my greatest meals. Roll tape, Harvey!

    Harvey: Taping doesn’t begin for another two hours, Rachel. I’ll call your husband.

    (From floor): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Snort! I need sleepy!

    Capitalist Lion Tamer

    April 19, 2010 at 11:26 pm

    • Capitalist Lion Tamer, thanks. I’ve never wanted to see anything more in my life than a Rachel Ray show after your awesome account. Outstanding!

      Ramblin' Rooster

      April 26, 2010 at 2:52 am

  2. Rachel Ray and Ramblin Rooster have the same towels.

    besides that.. omg CLT.

    OK then. I can’t even think of a meal without food that will top that. I’m just going to wander back over to the sane part of wordpress.

    What do you mean, “there isn’t one”?

    Claire Collins

    April 21, 2010 at 2:53 am

  3. Your dad has that crazy sort of “I’ll be your huckleberry” courage that was most notable in the old west. I, on the other hand have that “please freeze my head cause I don’t wanna die” cowardice most notable in today’s pansy ass version of Hollywood.

    I’m going to go with CLT for the riddle because it is just such a fun ride.

    Scott Oglesby

    April 25, 2010 at 7:27 am

    • Scott Oglesby, somewhere in Hollywood there’s a warehouse with over half a million frozen heads. Sure hope you don’t get lost on the shelf. It kind of makes me wonder what a guy could do alone in a warehouse full of heads…

      Ramblin' Rooster

      April 26, 2010 at 3:02 am

      • Or a headhouse full of wares.

        Claire Collins

        April 26, 2010 at 3:46 am

        • Claire Collins, that makes no sense. How can you go necrophiliac on a ware?

          Ramblin' Rooster

          April 26, 2010 at 3:55 am

          • I’m more concerned about you going necrophiliac? Just a reminder… those heads are frozen.

            Claire Collins

            April 26, 2010 at 6:39 pm

            • Claire “Big T” Collins, that’s what microwaves are for. Just be sure to let it cool for at least a minute before starting, as the center will be extremely hot, (or still frozen).

              Ramblin' Rooster

              May 3, 2010 at 1:16 am

              • Ew! This has to be the most mis-directed conversation we’ve ever had. Ok fine. It’s a normal conversation for us, but still… Ew!

                Claire Collins

                May 6, 2010 at 2:57 am

  4. I had the thought that a mealworm would be a meal without food, but he kinds lives on food, or at least the makings of food. Does that count?

    Claire Collins

    April 26, 2010 at 2:39 am

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